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Why You Should Give a Jerk a Second Chance
I posted this video to the Greenlight Community. We’re all going to run into a jerk now and then. Here’s why you should give ‘em a second chance.
Find more videos like this on Greenlight Community
Posted by Keith Ferrazzi on October 3, 2008 | Permalink
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I want to share a personal story about a jerk I once met years ago. Robin was rude, crude and sometimes, no, more often than not, just plain mean guy! There were so many people that did not like him that it was difficult to find any that did. But there was something about this guy that just said to me, have patience, be nice and as my mom always said to me "when someone isn't nice to you, kill them with kindness". I felt I needed to get to know him as there was something I needed to learn from him, it was in my destiny. So I put up with his nasty comments, crude jokes and often, mean teasing. I listened to him do it to others and was appauled, often begging him not to treat them that way. People around me could not understand why i would even hang out with him; they thought I was insane! I just knew that he was worth knowing. Finally, little by little his walls started to come down, he was letting me see the real Robin. Over the years, Robin introduced me to many wonderful, influencial and famous people. He helped me get a great new job, as he felt i would be perfect for it. He was right! We became roomates and very good friends. Why did he become such a jerk? He had been teased relentlessly when he was a child as he was overweight. He had suffered so much mental abuse for so many years that he had built up a tough shell and a very big wall. Being so crude and rude kept him protected from all the other jerks out there. Then he lost alot of weight, started his career, but the jerk stayed. It was his only protection. He only let commpassionate, caring people who really wanted to know him into his circle; only those he trusted. I moved to Vancouver and he moved to LA. We only got together once after that and we have lost touch now, much to my saddness. Robin taught me many things about human behaviour. I miss him and will always hold him dear to my heart. He was the biggest jerk i have ever met.
Posted by: Maxine | Oct 5, 2008 5:54:47 AM
Maxine,
Nice story but seriously, what if everyone who had ever been teased(and many many people have), acted like that? Do the undsuspecting adults your friend encountered deserve the wrath from a long ago weight problem? I think not. Your mother was right, but so was the person who says if you can't say something nice....
Having been teased as a child does not give anyone the right to go around abusing innocent people and putting on them what he did not like being put on him.
Posted by: alexa | Oct 10, 2008 12:43:46 PM
As his friend, you should have helped him see how he was being perceived. I'm sure his behaviour was limiting him in both his professional and personal life. Kudos to you for seeing past it, but not for letting it continue.
Posted by: ns | Oct 14, 2008 2:18:27 PM
http://www.10thousandpeople.com
Posted by: peo | Oct 16, 2008 9:33:08 AM
